In Balkans we fight. We have fought for centuries and even when we don’t fight, we’re still fighting about something. Why? Well, because we change the channel when there’s some kissing involved.

Let me explain:

Growing up I loved watching movies with my family - my parents + my sisters. Say we were watching some PG-13 movie and there happened to be two horny people getting ready to kiss, the channel would flip to another station as if nothing happened. I used to think “We’re fucking missing the best part!”, but at 10 I didn’t have many communication skills developed to counterattack that incredible action of indecent move by my parents and their remote. Oh, let me think, we had no remote back then! Someone had to actually get up and do the walk-of-shame of changing the channel! Oh, the awkwardness! Oh My GOD!

On the flip-side, say there was a war scene, the channel was never flipped. As if it was OK to keep watching.

I’m not a sociologist or a demographics statistician, but somehow I have a sneaky suspicion that this happens all over the place and especially in the households of people I grew up around with. Now, if we were only to change this and watch people kissing and humping each other instead of fighting, Balkans would have been a much different place, no?

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